Nuclear Nonsense

Those clever folks at Halifax have added a new clause to my contents insurance.

“Carpets, fixtures & fittings etc will not be covered under any instance of nuclear attack”

Anyone who understands the science of nuclear physics and watches ‘Heroes’ knows that even a beardy weirdy with wobbly jelly hands can reduce a whole city to twisted metal and rubble. If this is the case I wonder what a direct hit might do to my house.

I have a gut feeling that I may have better things to do than claim for my carpets, such as scoop up my remaining burnt flesh from a 50 mile radius and stick it back together.

Happy New Year.


3 Responses to Nuclear Nonsense

  1. Mr Angry says:

    Does this mean that in the even of any house insurance claim they are going to want to be sure you weren’t the victim of a nuclear attack?

    “Hello Halifax, my house was broken into and my TV was stolen.”

    “Right. Are you absolutely sure you haven’t been the victim of a nuclear attack?”

    “Pretty sure I guess, there is a broken window and muddy footprints.”

    “Which could have been caused by a three-headed cow in the aftermath of a nuclear holocaust.”

    I think you should try and make a claim for a nuclear attack and see if they believe you.

  2. Rach says:

    I’m with Mr Angry on trying to make a claim, think you should do it for the sake of public interest! Oh and let us know how you get on too

  3. The Inkless Thinker says:

    Rach – Welcome

    Hopefully a fraudulent three headed cow related claim won’t deem me uninsurable for the future. Who needs insurance anyway.

    Moooooo, “hey you cow monster thing, come back with my telly”


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